Lisa Find Love

When Ian Burkhart broke his neck diving into a wave in 2010, he had no idea that about four years later, he would make history as the first quadriplegic to regain control of his limbs using his own thoughts.

At the time, the devastated 19-year-old knew only that an experimental study at nearby Ohio State University Wexner Medical School offered hope. Burkhart’s spinal injury had severed the communication pathway between the motor cortex in his brain and the muscles in his limbs, but this study proposed a detour.

Doctors had Burkhart think about moving his hand while researchers took fMRI scans to light up key brain areas. Based on those coordinates, in April 2014, Ali Rezai, MD, director of Ohio State’s Center for Neuromodulation, placed a microchip smaller than a pea in the motor cortex, which controls the hand. The chip was connected via a computer to an electrode-studded sleeve on Burkhart’s arm that stimulated his muscles. Burkhart’s thoughts now had a new bypass to his hand.

Two months later, Dr. Rezai was standing behind his patient in a lab crowded with cameras, physicians, engineers, and family, all eyes on Burkhart’s right hand. When it moved for the first time, Burkhart made history. “It was a surreal moment,” Dr. Rezai remembers. “The whole team was amazed, but then we said, ‘OK, the work is just beginning. He’s got to be able to pick up a cup of coffee.’”

In the years since, subject and software have been learning from each other. “The machine is continuously improving its algorithms, and Ian is able to think about things with more fluidity,” says Dr. Rezai. “It’s phenomenal seeing the brain and computer coming together.”

Burkhart is now able to swipe a credit card and play Guitar Hero.

MORE: This Kind Stranger Helped a Paralyzed Teen Finish High School (And More)

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Few medical conditions strike faster and with more finality than the brain death caused by stroke. But a new procedure has had such success that hospitals around the country are changing their protocols.

Normally, large-vessel strokes—big clots in big arteries that jeopardize blood flow to huge brain territories—are deadly. Existing blood-thinning medications aren’t effective at dissolving large clots.

MORE: 7 Signs of Stroke You Might Ignore

But this treatment vacuum recently was flooded with five major clinical trials demonstrating the effectiveness of mechanical thrombectomy, in which a catheter is threaded through an artery in the groin and up to the blockage in the brain, where a stent pulls the clot from the vessel.

“This is the penicillin era in stroke treatment,” says Alexander A. Khalessi, MD, vice chairman of clinical affairs in the department of neurosurgery at UC San Diego Health.

The chance of a full recovery from a large-vessel stroke goes down each minute it’s left untreated; with mechanical thrombectomy, that number soars to above 60 percent if treatment is started within six hours, says Dr. Khalessi. “Patients go from literally dying to going home to their families—it’s about as miraculous a thing as you can encounter in medicine.”

MORE: Carotid Artery Surgery: Could It Give You a Stroke?

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Someone with a lot of time on his hands—probably not a parent—came up with meanings for many of the flowers that decorate our lives. Red roses are for true love, daisies are for innocence, orchids are for beauty, and so on. And now, as a parent, I’d like to add red clover to the list of flowers with special meaning.

Red clover is a tenacious little plant that grows wild on our farm. Many people consider it a weed, but red clover was one of the first plants our daughters, Emmalyn and Alexis, recognized and appreciated. We taught them to pull the tiny pink straws from the soft blossoms and chomp on them to release droplets of the sweet juice. Yum! Bees dance around red clover, and butterflies can’t resist it. What’s not to love?

Our horses also relish it. In the spring, there’s no sweeter treat than handfuls of clover.

When one of our horses was injured and confined to his stall for several months, he hated his treatment so much that he resented the arrival of any human—except for two little girls who toddled up to his door with hand-picked gifts of clover and sincere chatter about how sorry they were that he was sick.

When another horse reached old age and lost his sight, handfuls of clover arrived regularly in his feed dish. The girls worried that he might not be able to find it on his own anymore.

But the sweetest moment came one summer, months after we had to have Carm, one of our mares, put down. The girls were full of questions about the whole sad process and fascinated by having her buried on our farm, which had been her home for over a decade.

I found them, one afternoon, lingering by that secluded grave. “What are you doing?” I asked. They jumped up, startled.

“Nothing,” they replied, which always means exactly the opposite.

“This isn’t really a place to play, you know.”

“We know.”

Then I saw what they had been doing. Carefully laid out in the middle of the grave was a generous circle of red clover blossoms. Each blossom was perfect—soft and round and beautifully colored. It must have taken forever to find and pick so many.

I stayed there a long time, just staring.

We talked about it later, once I was able to speak. I told them I thought it was very sweet. They didn’t think it was such a big deal: “She liked clover, Mom. There’s no grass there yet, and we thought if we picked clover, she would see it and be happy.”

Sometimes the smallest of gestures is the most meaningful.

There are no words to describe the happiness and pride that lingered with my sadness. And so, for our family at least, one more flower has a special meaning: red clover, the sweet, strong flower of compassion.

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“Every family is a system of constantly moving parts. When one part of the system changes, it creates change in all the other parts. What this means is that when one family member experiences a mental health challenge, all family members are affected.”

– Jon Hershfield, MFT, in When a Family Member has OCD

Obsessive compulsive disorder can be incredibly disabling for the affected individual and completely baffling for the family. So much more than frequent hand washing, OCD can take over the life of those struggling with this disorder and that of their family. In his new book, When a Family Member has OCD: Mindfulness & Cognitive Behavioral Skills to Help Families Affected by Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, Jon Hershfield provides a guide for navigating the many twists and turns of supporting a family member with OCD, from understanding the illness and its treatment to coping with the complex family dynamics.

Hershfield’s book provides a unique perspective as he has been on both sides of the therapeutic coin. In the introduction, he shares, “I grew up in an OCD family. By the time I asked for help for my OCD (around age fourteen), I was already used to hearing about ‘his OCD,’ ‘her OCD,’ ‘their OCD,’ and everybody else’s OCD throughout the family tree.” The son of a psychiatrist, he had the good fortune of a supportive and understanding family that helped him deal with his own mental illness, noting, “Mom sent me care packages in college with the usual — you know, mail from home, a new pair of socks, a Prozac refill.” When he decided to complete a Master’s degree, he focused on CBT for OCD. His professional focus still remains on OCD, but, as he points out, “I live and breathe OCD, but in a much different way now. The irony is not lost on me.” He brings this experience — as provider, family member and patient — to bear in his book.

In the first section of the book “Understanding OCD,” Hershfield gives an overview of the illness. While written in a way that is understandable for the uninitiated, he covers the important aspects including biological, genetic, and psychological contributions to the disorder. But he goes beyond the textbook understanding to incorporate true-to-life examples and apparent paradoxes, anticipating the frustrations of those living with OCD. He writes, “If your family member has Contamination OCD, you may wonder how he can be so particular about some things and so complacent about others. How can he wash his hands 100 times a day yet leave garbage on his bedroom floor?” His explanations of these conundrums resonate with the feeling of someone who has been there. “Don’t judge yourself too harshly if you think [the behavior of the person with OCD] is somewhat ridiculous. It boggles your mind and it doesn’t make sense because you can’t help but look at it from a more logical standpoint.” His understanding for the family members of those with OCD offers reassurance in what can be a frustrating process.

The second section, “Supporting your Family with OCD,” builds upon the first. Living in a family, Hershfield notes, requires accommodation. However, when living with someone with OCD, “there’s a hole in the system and a nearly unlimited supply of accommodation to fill the hole…” Rather than helping, accommodation can provide fertile ground in which OCD can flourish. Thus, this section offers specific, detailed strategies to help divert this unending need for accommodation and provide support for dealing with their obsessions and compulsions. He goes into further detail in separate chapters focusing on various common issues with OCD families may encounter, such as repetitive checking, an incessant need for reassurance, and constant washing and cleaning.

The final section examines the perspectives of various family members dealing with a loved one with OCD. Whether you are the parent, partner, or sibling, Hershfield offers a series of dos, don’ts and observations about how to support both the individual affected with OCD and yourself. He also provides an overview of the treatment providers and treatment options to help the family negotiate the process with the affected person.

Overall, When a Family Member has OCD is packed with important information on living with and loving someone who struggles with obsessive compulsive disorder. OCD affects the entire family, but also the whole family can be involved in addressing it. As Hershfield eloquently writes, “When your family system comes together to battle OCD, the system will evolve: your family will grow closer, more cherished, and more reliable than ever.”

When a Family Member has OCD: Mindfulness & Cognitive Behavioral Skills to Help Families Affected by Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder
New Harbinger Publications, December 2015
Paperback, 200 pages
$16.95

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The fresh scent and essential oils in oranges make orange peels an excellent natural cleaner and air freshener.

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Knowing the truth about this scary cancer can help you protect yourself.

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The real test of our manners comes when we are dealing with our most embarrassing moments. Here are some doozies, and tips from the etiquette experts on how to handle them with grace.

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